Theory Falsified D:

(Woah. Never realized how weirdly “theory” is spelled. No wonder foreigners have difficulty with English. o_O)

I had a theory and I wanted evidence to support it. I picked The Pest to help me with this.

Knowing me, this theory just HAS to involve NEWS in some way, right?

My infatuation is so unhealthy. >_<

My theory is simple: A person’s singing voice matches that person’s face. All the NEWS members’ voices seem to match their faces. I was determined to find some supporting evidence for this and disprove that it’s just my NEWS bias controlling my brain. That’s where The Pest came in.

He really hates NEWS. He hates everything I like, really. I like happy, bouncy, cheery songs; he likes death metal and screaming and heavy drums. So, it wasn’t easy getting him to listen to samples of NEWS music. I had to bribe bargain with him and pay him with the little money I had left, i.e. two of my three quarters. I am poor. D:

I made him listen to the solos of three songs: Smile Maker, Share, and Akai Hana. After each solo, I would pause the song, ask him to point to the person he thinks is singing, and I’d record it down. And then I’d rejoice if he gets most of them right, or hang my head if he misses most of them. These were the results.

For Smile Maker:

  • Yamapi’s voice matches his face. The Pest’s answer to this sent my hopes soaring to the stars because he matched the first solo correctly, so how badly can things go? As it turned out — quite.
  • Massu should have Ryo’s voice.
  • Tegoshi should have Massu’s voice.
  • Ryo should have Koyama’s voice.
  • Shige should have Tego’s voice. (By this point my face was fixed permanently at :O)
  • Koyama should have Shige’s voice.

For Share:

  • Shige should have Koyama’s voice. Opposite of before, how curious. Well, that’s KoyaShige for you. :Db
  • Yamapi should have Ryo’s voice.
  • Again, Tego should have Massu’s voice.
  • Ryo should have Shige’s voice, which kind of makes sense because I always mixed up their voices in my first month of getting acquainted with NEWS. (Took me forever to figure out that Ai Nante is sung by three people.) I can hear fanfic!Ryo profusely protesting and swearing at me.
  • Massu should have Ryo’s voice. I totally recall going, “Oh God,” here. Out loud. Because it’s the second time The Pest matched Ryo’s voice to Massu.
  • Koyama should have Tegoshi’s voice.

For Akai Hana:

  • Koyama should have Yamapi’s voice.
  • Shige should have Ryo’s voice, reverse of the results for Share.
  • Same as in Smile Maker, Ryo should have Koyama’s voice. There’s a little RyoKoyaShige going on here.
  • Yamapi should have Tegoshi’s voice.
  • Tegoshi should have Shige’s voice. O____O He better not have Shige’s voice. I love Shige to squishy bits and all, but in all honesty, his voice only sounds great in certain songs.
  • Massu sounds like Massu, yayanothermatch!

And thus, the above evidence crushed my theory. Interesting how The Pest matched Massu’s voice to Tego’s face twice. I remember doing this experiment last month with the Winter Party Diamond performance of I.ZA.NA.I.ZU.KI, and The Pest matched Tegoshi with Massu’s voice then, too. Hmm.

Well, that experiment was stupid. XP Didn’t prove anything except that I come up with stupid theories. But at least I forced The Pest to listen to NEWS music when he clearly wanted to knock himself out with a brick. :D

To further torture him, I made him tell me who in NEWS he thought is the oldest and who’s the youngest. He thought the oldest is Shige (XDD) and the youngest is Massu.

I’ll end this entry with a NEWS-related picture, like I’ve done for my past four entries.

KoyaTego this time, because the world needs more KoyaTego. And because I don’t have enough Koyama in this journal. This picture was taken when NEWS was in California, I think. Yep, I can tell by their colorful, terribly clashing outfits. (I can’t help but wince when I see the six of them together.) I wonder how the Californians reacted to this KoyaTego moment. xD

And what is with Tegoshi and his ritualistic food sharing? I think he’s done it with everyone but Shige, who is loyal only to Koyama.

Until next time,

~ Mimi :3

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